Straight from the (Jack)Ass' mouth

separating the men from the boys?

last night i was watching "about a boy" followed up with "sleepless in seattle"... talk about piling on the chick flicks (please excuse my political incorrectness.)

however that last statement could not be farther from the truth.

these were man movies. or rather more appropriately man-and-boy movies. man movies without "the family" or the fast cars or the guns or the naked chicks.

the two movies were primarily about (like all the centuries of human history): relationships and commitment.

the two men represent two ends of one spectrum. "about a boy's" protagonist, will, was a bachelor who has never held a steady job and cavorts about with no intention to be attached to anyone. he's bloody ibiza; the antithesis of "no man is an island."

"sleepless in seattle" on the other hand is the radio pseudonym of sam baldwin, a widower and father, insomniac, and is someone who can no longer commit believing that what he had with his wife was so special that it could never again happen.

enter the two boys. the boy in "about a boy" was marcus, a 12-year old dressed by his hippie mother, sings out at the most inappropriate times, and is a social pariah in school.

the second boy is jonah. sam baldwin's 8 year old son, who in his struggle to cope with his father's depression embarks on a quest to find him a new wife.

easily the men represent a fear to commit (many women would agree) but beyond that they are the ones alone (not alot of women would understand). the bachelor. the widower. they have fashioned for themselves lives of independence and self-reliance that leave them abstracted from the idea of commitment. perhaps selfish but, yes, very much self-involved and definitely self-assured of their abilities. they are also the ones that represent experience; having gone through life and supposedly in the know of how things go.

the boys in the other hand were what men used to be. inexperienced with the complexities of the "mature" world they are all optimism and honesty. but moreso they are the ones that recognize in themselves their own vulnerability and need. they know that they need others and they have no fear of expressing this fact because it is in them to speak of what they see.

combine each man with their corresponding boy and voila a fairy-tale-chick-flick-ideal-man.

however this is an instance where life could take a good cue from the movies.

here are two men who were so sure that they could live their lives without having to resort to real relationships to make them happy. in come the boys who, with their honesty, show reality for what it really is and eventually put the men back on track.

relationships aren't optional. they're natural.

commitment isn't optional. it's essential.

you can try to be happy alone but it never hurts to have some help.

----
william: a name meaning resolute, stubborn. marcus: a name meaning hammer. appreciate the poetry... a hammer that shatters the resolute and stubborn. samuel: meaning heard by god. jonah: meaning dove. again appreciate... the dove was the second bird sent out by Noah (after a raven) and would later come back with an olive leaf. the great flood was ending.

posted by Peejay @ 6/08/2004 10:23:00 PM